I can’t really fathom what it must be like to be in Japan right now, amidst a giant crock pot of fuckery, where every conceivable force of nature or man, seems to want to wipe your very existence out.
It’s making for most unsatisfactory thoughts and I’m thousands of miles away. Those poor people? I wager they’re not sitting there safe and comfortable, sipping hot coffee and sucking on some toffee chocolate balls, like I am. They’re trying to be someplace where there’s less possibility of expiring from radiation sickness, lava or their house falling on them. If they still have a house. This is making me frown an unnatural amount.
I hate to mention him again, but I have slightly worrying idea that Charlie Sheen might factor into this. It seems the more insanity he spouts, the harder Japan gets pounded. I’m pretty sure there’s a correlation there somewhere, if we just look hard enough…
Anyway, here’s to those people having some sanity and semblance of normalcy restored again someday.
In other news, I’m not sure what I did to deserve this, somewhat illiterate, word verification:
So close, Blogger, so close
Sucking balls, huh? You crazy Canadians and the things you do in the middle of the day.
ReplyDeleteThey're toffee balls though. TOFFEE! And they complement coffee perfectly. What am I to do? It would be unsporting of me to refuse.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Charlie Sheen doesn't care or doesn't even know something happened in Japan. As for the rest of the world, prayers and any help are needed in Japan. Let's send and do what we can to help them.
ReplyDeleteBest pie chart, ever. And I'm guessing Charlie Sheen has something to do with your word verification...
ReplyDeleteRoger that, LACM. Actually, Charlie Sheen could probably afford some of that 2 mil an episode he was making to help in the restoration effort in Japan, no?
ReplyDeleteBrutie: Now THAT makes sense. :)
ReplyDeleteSomeone at work today gleefully informed me that it is National Pi Day (3.14) and since it is only one letter removed from "pie," we should all eat pie in its honor. I'm down.
ReplyDeleteSo all that to say your pie chart is timely.
Check me out being almost topical! :)
ReplyDeleteI am waiting for the religious freaks to start spouting why Japan deserved this because they are not christian enough.
ReplyDeleteCharlie Sheen deserved this, but not Japan.
Haha, yes that would not surprise me one bit. One of my pet peeves. As I'm sure you know.
ReplyDeletei feel so bad for those poor peeps!!! scary earthquake PLUS nuclear meltdown?? awful.
ReplyDeleteon funny note... today is not only pi day, but steak and blow job day, as well. just.. you know... so that you're totally informed! BUT NOBODY TELL MY HUSBAND!!!!
Wait is there a day for everything now? Who decides these things? When is 'win the lottery' day? I'm all over that.
ReplyDeleteI'm keeping up with events via BBC Online. I can't bear to turn my tv set on.
ReplyDeleteYou've just reminded me...I need chocolate therapy. Hold on a sec...ahhh...much better.
Right, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I can't bear to watch the news. The juxtaposition of some petty idiot holding forth and the utter devastation of Japan. My heart can't take it.
Mind you, a slice of that pie would help. Do you ship to the UK?
Dude, I have a feeling it would be sporting a whole new lifeform by the time it arrived. :) I also am not watching the news. I see enough online thank you. Plus the news stations end up aggravating me on top of everything. No thank you.
ReplyDeleteOh...Crap!!! I did it again...Why cant you put your comments at the bottom??....geeesh...anyways...It is a big piece of pie....like i said
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha! It cracks me up every time, you DOLT. It's not my fault, the template comes that way. I mean I COULD go in and mess some more with the code but who can be bothered? Plus I'd do that and REALLY confuse people.
ReplyDeleteAnd that didn't take long at all:
ReplyDeletehttp://gawker.com/#!5781856/young-woman-thanks-god-for-atheist+killing-tsunami
There you go! I knew they were out there, the crazies. Talking of, I just watched that Oscar nominated documentary "Jesus Camp". Incredulous. Yet not.
ReplyDeleteI love that pie chart. There's a berry pie at my house right now that looks just like that, and is an accurate representation of how much I have eaten.
ReplyDeleteMy brother and his family live in Japan and I'm trying not to be all, "HI. WE ARE NOT FREAKING OUT. HA HA. HOPE YOU ARE WELL. WRITE SOON."
But I think I sort of am being that way. No wonder he doesn't write back.
*SIGH*
You know, on the upside, I'm sure if something bad had happened to your family you'd have known by now. I say no news is good news. I'm sure they have a lack of communications going on there. Ugh. Good luck though. Stay calm and when you hear they're fine, eat the rest of that pie!
ReplyDeleteIt is just dreadful to contemplate the hardships Japanese people are facing... it does not seem right at all for one nation to face such devastation.
ReplyDeleteI think you're onto something with Charlie Sheen being to blame.... him and that crockpot Col Gads...the more nonsense they spew, the angrier the gods are getting. Might I suggest we sacrifice them as a peace offering?
Yeah damn Col Gads too and his dictatory ass. The world's in a shambles. What's next?
ReplyDeleteI've seen a TON of pie charts and this is by far the best one!!!
ReplyDeleteYes, Japan is certainly in the middle of the perfect shit storm. What's next? Fuji will have a major eruption?
Let's hope it's the end of nature's wrath for a while. The last couple of years have been crazy. Hope you Californians and other North American westies are not in danger.
ReplyDeleteYou certainly summed up and put into perspective the incredible sadness that is now Japan. Those poor people ...He who shall not be named is definitely behind this in some way.
ReplyDeleteAs for satan, he can have the pie. I want the cookies and chocolate!
Cookies and chocolate are ok too. Pie and cake though are top. You'll just have to take my word for it. :)
ReplyDeleteBloody awful what's happening out in Japan - too hideous to contemplate.
ReplyDelete...and Charlie Sheen has a lot to answer for that's all I can say...
Oh and well done you on your pie chart...very impressive...must have taken you ages...
When the world is a shitfight, the answer is pie and more pie. Especially if it's a custard fart, which your pie chart appears to be. Custard farts are like a little piece of heaven fell into your mouth. The cool pie filled heaven that is, not the batshit crazy screw the heathens nutter filled heaven that always comes out in times like these.
ReplyDeleteOh man in the midst of my custard fart mental orgasm brain I think I just anonymoused you. So sorry. I blame the pie.
ReplyDeleteI'm a bit disappointed, I thought you had resolved to call them 'cake charts'.
ReplyDeleteJapan per capita has had the world's worst luck with nuclear events.
Lottie: Certainly is terrible. Pie makes everything better though.
ReplyDeleteRusty: No, dude I got it. Anonymous comments automatically delete. So you're good. :) All that custard pie thing really did a number on you, huh? :)
Eric: And quakes. Yikes. You're right about pie though. I'm not sure it would help Japan right now, however.
ReplyDeleteYou show a pie, but failed to mention today is pie day 3.14...and everyone should have pie today.
ReplyDeleteAh but someone mentioned it in a comment earlier so I now KNOW and feel vindicated. :)
ReplyDeleteI bet pie could save Japan.
ReplyDeleteI guess it all depends on the pie really...
ReplyDeleteI don't understand the people who feel they have to say mean things about the quake victims. Like it makes them cool. Not cool.
ReplyDeleteOh, Veg, you are so funny. Love the pie chart...and any madness is possible where Charlie Sheen is concerned!
ReplyDeleteSee comment to previous post.
ReplyDeleteLibby: Me neither. Assholes. Someone always has to be a fuckhead though. You're a news lady you know this! Are you covering quake stuff?
ReplyDeleteEva: Pie is always necessary though. Someone said that is a custard pie and I like custard but I prefer thinking of it as a lemon pie. Without the meringue.
Tennyson: Tenny babeh! Haha, you fell for the comment snafu. :) Hi though!
That pie chart makes me very hungry!
ReplyDeleteMe too, if only it were a real pie in my fridge right now. Sadly, it is not. :(
ReplyDeleteIs the pie in honor of Pi day? Today is 3-14 no?
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the pi party, Mrs. B. :)
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of pie is that? Lemon? I'd like a slice. Or the whole thing.
ReplyDeleteOh...almost forgot. Years ago I had a picture of me and a friend pretening to be buffalo (don't ask). Some guy saw the picture and accused me of being a Satin worshiper. I told him I preferred silk but I'd look in to Satin for sheets and stuff.
ReplyDeleteDisasterous: I like to hope it's lemon but I got the picture online so you know...it can be anything you want! Also satin is much more fun than Satan and more luxurious. And less hot. :)
ReplyDeleteWhen I win my PulitzerNobelBookerAcademy prize, I will be thanking you, Assassin.
ReplyDeleteSarah xxx
I feel I need to tell you that my pee is the exact same color as the pie you have not eaten. And no, I'm not sucking on highlighters. I don't think.
ReplyDeleteWhen I saw the mention of 'Satan and pie' I felt sure that it was your write up about Alabama. I'm disappointed, frankly. However, you redeemed yourself with your pie chart :)
ReplyDeleteJapan is suffering some heavy shit right now. It doesn't really seem fair does it?
Sarah: Well I just hope you're wearing something fabulous when you do. What am I saying, of course you will be. :)
ReplyDeleteElly: Thanks for that, man. That's reassuring to know. Is it all those pre-natal vitamins or what?
Wylye: Damn, I lost a chance there. When you see me mention banjos and guns I'll be talking about Alabama. :)
Blogger is obviously blind, deaf, and dumb.
ReplyDeleteMy father is clearly Saten.
And I'm pretty sure he doesn't blog. His signature looks like this: X
X stands for Jimbo.
So the solution to the problem in Japan is to stay indoors with the windows closed... where's there's probably no electricity, running water or food... Holeee fugg...
ReplyDeleteI don't know if that's like.. a Kanadia thing, but what's saten? I've tried reading it out loud with different ways of pronouncing it and I still don't get it.
ReplyDeleteAnd how does it relate to Charlie Sheen, which btw, I have no idea what he's done nor do I care, but all over blogs and the entertainment NEWS, there's Charlie Sheen.
This is way too confusing for me before breakfast AND lunch, I'll blame you if I only get dinner today!
Ms. OWO: Maybe it was meant for your dad then? :) And he spelled it differently to be KEWL?
ReplyDeleteCap'n: Yep. It's a bunch of fuckery no matter how you roll it, really. Indoors, outdoors, it all wants to kill them!
Wynn: Dude, seriously? No of course it's not serious, you're messing with my head again. Trickster!
Your pie chart made me laugh out loud. My kid wanted to know what's so funny, so I showed her while laughing so hard I could barely speak and she just stared at me.
ReplyDeleteAnd stared at me.
And stared at me some more.
Great. Now my kid thinks I'm an idiot. Thanks a lot.
Dude, she had to find out sooner or later. :)
ReplyDeleteI swear I had "fuckery" on wv once, or maybe it was "fukery". I'm thinking Sheen has a hand in THAT.
ReplyDeleteMy kids already know I'm an idiot. I cleared that up day one just so there wouldn't be any confusion or tell-all books down the road.
Off to buy the kids Kool-Aid now.
Because I'm THAT kind of mom also.
I think the internet tried to bend me over the table because just after my stupid comment I posted another, telling you that I am in fact stupid (or at least lagging like an old school computer at times) and that I totally get it.
ReplyDeleteBuuuut, internet thought it should take the chance to embarrass me. Thank you, internet.
Chef: Oh please, let them have the Kool Aid. Just you know...no cyanide. :)
ReplyDeleteWynn: The Internetz are a bitch. Show it who's boss!
Wait wait wait. It was steak and blow job day? As in, steak day, and blow job day? Or was it really steak AND blow job day? Cuz that's just too much. Seriously. When is "husband scrubs the bathroom and takes the kids out all afternoon" day?
ReplyDeleteAnd, a bloggy friend posted this to help people in Japan: http://likeabirdie.blogspot.com/2011/03/socks-for-japan.html
It is in fact Steak & Blowjob Day. Not that I know why dudes need steak day becuse they can eat steak anytime!
ReplyDeleteI totally forgot about that day, and obviously so did bf. No loss. Hm..
Ladies, I hope you enjoyed your uh. Steak. Yes.
ReplyDeleteI've spent an inordinately long time trying to identify that pie. I'm going with no-bake lemon pie. The top is too damn smooth!
ReplyDelete