Dear Google...

Thursday, March 1st, 2012 - What is this?  Sunshine?

Hey you!  Yes you.  Google.  You over there trying on your shiny, new Overlord coat.  What's up with all the new stuff?  I don't like new stuff.  I'm a connoisseur of old stuff like vintage jackets, sixties' cars and Andy Williams (shut up).    What in the name of all that is holy is up with this ugly new layouty stuff?

And don't get me started on the new captcha nonsense.  How did you know that what I really want when I'm trying to force my opinion on someone, is to have to type two, totally illegible words that will be rejected three times before I can post? You must be TOTALLY PSYCHIC.

I AM STARTING TO HATE YOU, GOOGLE.

I also hate your new comment form thing where you type the comment at the top but you might be responding to something at the bottom so you have to scroll like a motherfucker to remember what you're responding to.  I HATE THAT.

And your new privacy policy can bite me.  My history in my Google account is paused, I never surf while logged into my Google account, I private browse 100% of the time and you can just leave my shit alone as it's none of your beeswax if I want to websurf questions like, "is it normal to want to lick icebergs?", or, "how much blood is in a toddler?".  I reserve the right to do so without you thinking I'm some shameful weirdo.

Also, I'm sick of you trying to connect my services and log me in every damn where.  I am branching out.  I am going rogue.  I am limiting my Google services.   Watch me fly!

In other news, I have coffee and boy, did I need caffeinating!