This week I finally bit the bullet and bought a new phone. I'd had my trusty old one for four years and loved it to bits. Everyone I know seems to have had about three phones in that period, but not me. I loved my old lady and she was all I needed. However, lately, in her senility, like some sort of rogue robot, she decided to develop a personality.
It was little things at first, things like connecting to WiFi only when she felt like it, refusing to let me talk to The Google, and taking pictures that looked like someone had dropped a camera in a vat of porridge. Gradually, she started to move things around in my cupboards and drink all the wine in the fridge while propositioning all my friends, so I figured maybe it was time to just let her do her thing and retire to some mobile island some place tropical where she could relax on a beach oogling all the hot, naked, little Samsungs and Sonys, while I got myself a new mobile servant.
I forgot what a bitch setting up a new gadget can be. Logging into accounts and authenticating things and re-downloading apps and getting a different sized SIM card and blah di blah. But at least it works on my terms and doesn't turn itself off for no reason when I'm in the middle of something. It also refuses to fit in the pockets in most of my bags because it's the approximate size of an apartment block. It's nice to talk to The Google again too, even if it's just to say, "Okay Google, tell me how much Apple products suck!" Because I'm an Android girl forever, in case that isn't already clear.
In other news, the tree from the restaurant next door keeps leaking all over my car. It looks like it has the measles. Little specks of rusty-coloured, sticky crap everywhere that I cannot shift with any cleaner, even a scouring sponge like you use on the dishes. Every time I go to the supermarket, all the cars in the lot are shiny and clean, and my car looks like it just ran some obstacle course through an apocalypse. Gah. I'm getting there slowly with a slightly winning combination of "Goo Gone", WD-40, car cleaner, a pot scourer, and a pressure washer. Need to get either a car cover or a canopy in the driveway or lose my sanity all together.
This makes a good case, I believe, for wine.
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So. People have nudged me about my total ineptness at updating this thing and they are correct. It's just, I don't have a life reall...
I hate getting new phones. I finally broke down last year when mine got so pissy she refused to even call people anymore. Rude.
ReplyDeleteWhen I lived in Fl we had "love bug season". Utterly revolting. Dad poured coke all over the windshield and that was the only thing that did the trick. The soda kind of coke. Not the nose kind. In case that needed clarification.
Haha, thanks for that clarification, although truthfully, I'd try anything to remove the goo at this point. STUPID TREES, GROWING AND STUFF.
ReplyDeleteDamn smartphones are too smart. Could be the old one somehow got connected to that nearby tree. Tree revenge. Could be a new meme. It was only about a year ago that I finally gave in and switched to a smartphone. Old flip phone made calls and plain texts just fine. I'm glad I got the Android type. I find it strange (could be my odd view of things) that we went from the importance of connections and talk quality to the camera, memory, and screen quality. If phones were for talking then they should probably drop the descriptor "phone" from these devices.
ReplyDeleteI'm one of those types who keeps using the same phone for years until something forces me to get a new one. I loved my last one & didn't mind holding onto it for a while but ended up losing it after only about a year & a half. The one I'm using now is alright but I haven't been won-over by it. May actually end upgrading again sooner rather than later.
ReplyDeleteLisle: I think on my old phone I probably made ten calls over four years. I never use the offline ever and don't have a land line either. I textand use free apps to keep in touch with my family etc.I don't have a data plan either I just use Wi-Fi. My plan's fifteen bucks a month and does everything I need. Sweet. I don't know what people are doing that requires unlimited everything.
ReplyDeleteVinny: same here. I had my old nexus 4 for four years and there was never a reason to upgrade till recently when it started to show its age. people like to constantly get the newest, shiniest thing but my gadgets last forever and only get replaced when necessary. My new phone though, it's SEXY!
Hey there!
ReplyDeleteAll of these electronic devices we have now are great!
RIGHT up until they stop working right, or working at all.
I also have an older phone and it doesn't even have the ability to either send, or receive texts. Basically, it is my "hotspot" to get on the internet. Hell, I don't even like talking on the phone, much less being bugged by texts.
Sorry about your car. Mine is 14 years old and has never once been parked in a garage. I've given up on keeping it shiny.
New phones are so exciting and not all in the same sentence and emotion. LOL. I am so excited you dropped by. Now for some catching up to do! Hallelujah you are back online! Oh, how I have missed you. Sorry about your car. I have the same problem with Mulberry trees when the bird poops that purple shitola all over my car. Ugh. Except it isn't sticky. That part would really screw with things.
ReplyDeleteHaha, yes, I am stoked you are still out there as I lost all my subscriptions because blah blah blah stupid. :) I also have the bird poop problems. Giant, sloppy seagull shits. They're as lovely as they sound. It's like someone dumped a bowl of cookie dough on the windshield. GARRRRROSSSSSS!
ReplyDeleteThat tree has issues. Good Lord. It's bad enough when bird poo comes plummeting out of innocent looking trees, but sap so stubborn it requires Goo Gone and a scouring pad?! Does that tree have an STD?
ReplyDeleteDude, it has some kind of tree cooties for sure. I never saw such stubbornness.
ReplyDelete